melancholy

Have you ever felt so lost?
Anywhere you look, no one seems to be around.
You keep screaming for help, but your voice just echoes filling the empty corners of the cave.

Where are you?
How did you get there anyway?
Is there no way out of this labyrinth?

Your mind eddied on the thought of getting out.
You can hear silent drips of water and your footsteps banging together, making a melody of despair.

You're not there because of the wrong you've done.
It's because of the lack of attention and the ungenerous act of love.

The feeling of waiting and being left alone.
The feeling of being diverted into another dimension of catastrophe.
Being divided from your true feelings and reattached.

Oh when will this atrocity end.

If he was all you had and he left you, what's left of you?

how are you my dear?

after all you did to me
to be honest
i truly forgive you

because every little thing you do
every little sound you make
every single word you say
make me love you

and every big mistake you make
is erased by the fact that im so in love with you

your every smile
the way your eyes are closed every time you laugh
the way you stare at me with passion
and the way you say je t'aime
clears my polluted head

your laugh
your funny voice
and your cute gesture
makes breathing so easy

you make me able to sleep at night
and you're the reason i wake up in the morning

you help me survive through the hot bright sun
and you illuminate for me so i can see my path through the dim moon light at night

you.
you were mine.
then you went away.
far away.

knowing that i cant catch you
knowing that you're not mine
hurts me deeply

but knowing that you're happy
knowing that you're loving and being loved
gives me a glance of happiness and envy

i despair of ever having you again
i abandon my self from hope
im worthless now, despicable

oh ever did you know, you were my value
my other half
my meaning
a cliche to my story
a climax to my fairytale

forgive me for being too dramatic

but im a little idea unprovoked
a little drama that have yet to be played
a miracle that turns into a myth
a light that's dimmed by heart break

call me a liar
but i wont tell you the truth
if telling the truth would only drag you to my black hole
so let me lie once again,

im fine, thank you

cresent moon kissing an eclipse

we'll walk together along the beach
and let the sun envy on your heat
the waves keep chasing the shore
it's as if they're fighting just to get to touch a part of you
lets run around and laugh
lets sit down and watch the sun go down
lets play and watch the moon go up
then i'll watch you smile
and you'll illuminate the stars
i'll see you walk and walk
and slowly fade away into the night

music is not romance, blood is

why is it so crowded
why can i hear everything
even drops of my tear sounds like millions of drums banged together

haven't i heard enough noise?
do you want me too bleed
do you care if i do?

you said you love me
you said you'll never hurt me

then everything you do hurts more than anything i've ever felt

you said you'll color the sky with your love
well the sky is still a blank page, i guess you dont have anything to paint with

i remember everything you said to me
i can still listen to you in my head

now will you listen to me?

did you know that i cried so much that my eyes hurts
it burns
deep to my heart
now fire is water to me

i curse the day we were together
i curse the day you were born
i curse the day i met you
i curse the day i liked you
i curse the day i wanted you

but those were the day that the earth actually rotate
the day my heart starts pumping

you gave me life
but you took it all away
i still love you
baby, i do

you breathe my last breath

she was a joke
no one liked her
she was ugly
she was mean

she never wanted to be mean
its just that everyone else was mean
why shouldn't she?

she never wanted to be ugly
everyone else was just better looking

she tried making friends
her jokes was just never funny

she tried wearing make up
she was so pretty that even with a mask people would still cry looking at her

so she sat alone on that pavement
wondering what she did wrong
she saw pretty girls walk by
she saw dogs that looked better than her

every time she looks at the sky
the sky cries
i guess she was that ugly

you think im mean?



im her.

heavenly sin. guilty pleasure.

she's a whore
but she wont do lollipop
guarantee she's classier than blackberry
she's an A class on the run

"tell me am i not human for living life"

some stare with disgust
some stare with power
some stare with pity
some just walk away

she use to cry alone at night
knowing some things wrong but she cant stop it
she still cries.
but not often.

words and eyes.
they burn through her epidemic
she knew.
once she chose this path
she can never go back

she tried looking for help
looking for god or something
but she looked in all the wrong places
and she did all the wrong things

she was too late
she's now proud of a sin
she's glamorous
beauty and expensive
she doesn't cry anymore
she smiles.

everything still burns.
but hells fire is a cold shower on summer for her

that day she died
smiling.
she was holding prada on one hand
and a lollipop on the other

she fell.
deep
into a dark heaven like hole
it gave her everything
yet took everything

she got everything she wanted, yet she lost everything she had

she got
prada
louis vuitton
and gucci

she lost
her dignity
her name
her pride
and her life

that day nothing changed
the sky was the same
the star was the same
that old lady never changed

i guess that lady had nobody
and as she fades away
no one knew
or maybe no one cares

a family was something she was suppose to look for
but she got money instead

at least she got fame and fortune
is there ever anything wrong with fame and fortune?

you're hot cause you burn my heart to dust

damn the radio
im loosing control
he said he love me, he's not lying
but does he know how to love

i would rather be alone than to be loved like this
oh god can you hear my melody
i'm not religious. no
but they say you'll love me more than he does

can you see?
i colored my nails black
im not emo
im just proving how these nails are brighter than our love

you don't want to be apart
you don't want to stand without me
but you stab me and watched me bleed

you see those stars? i dont
i guess they dont shine anymore
they say its the air
but i know its you
you suck the light out of everything dont you?

im far from heaven
the angels wont even see my face
they hate me
im not a great person
i dont live the way people should

you kill the heaven out of me
you give horror to hell
and you smile

im left alone in shadows
im trembling
im cursing and laughing
then i cried

every time i laugh
i cry alone after

dont tell me you love me if you dont
dont lie to me
dont.
just stop right there.
i'll be waiting.
i promise.




i love you.